If you haven’t been around since the camp out, you’ve missed a lot. Pictures of the wedding hash means Udderly ReTiTulous has to explain to her future horrors one day why Pastor Bait-her thought it was important to run around New Orleans in a white dress and get drunk a day before they celebrated holy mattress monkey. Last Thursday signified the end of their ability to come and go as they pleased, of freely ogling members of the opposite sex, of innocently flirting without repercussion, and of making that monumental decision, “Should I go to the hash?” without first wondering what their cellmate, I mean soul mate, already has planned. While everyone was getting excited about the wedding, we also had two namings! Just Peyton and Just Tiffany will now be known as Pump me Brewster and Urine Jail, respectively.
Flash forward to April Fool’s day, Indicksion (that dead hare bitch) was caught pre-laying trail and being an over achieving bastard by running extra laps around Audubon park at the beer near while everyone else was consuming alcohol. For an April fool’s prank, all the harriers and harrierettes piled into a couple of trucks at the beer near and rode back to the On-In and continued drinking and singing hash songs. Meanwhile, back on trial, Indicksion and Dickie WongStockings ran a couple of miles laying flour for no one to follow.
Then circle happened. Who knew so many virgins lived in Marrero? I being cereal bra. Why would Cold Wet Douche bring new shiny boots? I realize you need to add flavor to bud light, but there has to be a better way. Who could have guessed Pick Up Fuck would cum late again? At least this time she wasn’t caught, on her knees, with her mouth inside Grandpa’s feet’s underwear…AGAIN. I’m going to have to remember that necklace hiding trick he has. Most importantly, we named our longest running “Just” in the hash. Hench forth, Just Kim will now be known as Shitty Titty Gang Bang and Just Barbie will now be known as UnderCummer.
NEXT WEEK – We have a special hasher visiting the city. See you wankers on Thursday. ON-ON,
Everything Butt Sex
tl;dr pastor udderly married, hashers skipped trail for April fool’s; pick up fuck cums late, but often; douche drinks from his shoes; 4 namings – Shitty Titty Gang Bang, UnderCummer, Pump me Brewster, Urine Jail; visiting hasher.