Hash Trash #160 – I never cum with Butt Sex

First of all let me state…..Lakeshore Drive by UNO is probably not the best place to start and end a hash considering the 5-0 po-po close that street off at 9pm which a veteran resident of lakeview should know (cough cough Butt Sex cough cough)

What a clusterfuck last night was.  We waited over an hour for the elusive Butt Sex to CUM, after all the talk of how AWESOME this lay would be and how we would experience Butt Sex like we never had before….he didn’t even show up! So we decided to stick with the only tried and true way to CUM. However someone decided this way was with Bumbletard and lets just say his name pretty much describes how his trail was. Poor Just Sara, this was her virgin lay and not only was let down by Butt Sex but she also had to handle ‘Tard:

**If you squint, take three shots of tequila, and back away from your computer screen about 5 feet, it looks like that could possible be Everything Butt Sex.**

“Did they just tie the flour to a cat and let it loose to lay this trail?” – Missing Period.

As the hares ran off into campus we apparently weren’t paying attention and ran the trail completely backwards, forwards, sideways and Kris Krossed. Random YBF’s leading into brick walls and orange post-it notes that brought us into buildings but didn’t show us the way out? If I didn’t know any better I would have thought Helen Keller herself laid this trail. Wankers were blowing whistles every which way and it didn’t help that Enough Already kept confusing On-One with On-On! At one point we decided to fuck trail and just oogle Shit Candy and his amazing performance skills on a Pole…..too bad we forgot to tip our dancer and all got called out in circle and made to do some Down-Downs.

When we got to circle we realized that a lot of people couldn’t handle this lay and bailed out…. We started with 6-8 virgins and only ended up with 1 at the end. I think that in itself explains this trail. As we sung to our Virgins, Cock-A-Booty-Boo was ready with some well placed cue cards since apparently our Drunk Asses can’t remember a certain part of the Virgin Song:

We celebrated a milestone for Just Jenna last night. She passed some fancy tests and soon (possibly now) she’ll be doling out some prescriptions for you pill poppin’ wankers. To celebrate we made her show us her oral skills incase any special wankers want or need a physical from her.

Circle ended smoother than it began and I think we all learned a lesson from last night:

Beware, No one cums with Butt Sex.

On- On Bitches,

8 Lays A Week

Reminders:
  • Halloween Hash: October 31st – 11am See Calendar for Details
  • Black Dress Run: Nov. 1st – 6:30pm See Calendar for Details
  • Cock-A-Booty-Boo has LA-Ren Fest tickets for cheap! First Served First to Cum!
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