Last night summed up New Orleans perfectly. We were in Clay Square Park, about to circle up when a cop shows. Cop: “Ya’ll can’t have beer in the park. The noise is fine. Can ya’ll just move out to the corner or the street, and drink?” I fucking love this city.
We took the cop’s advice and hashed 13 extra blocks, moving us from 11th crappy ass Ward to the 10th. What we found out is that the 10th Ward (i.e. district for you foreigners) is rather a good spot to host a bunch of overgrown children who likes to dress up and be obnoxious without buzzkill interruptions.
Circle went on forever last night, and it was awesome, however RA BB Dyke should learn how to use people’s hash names instead of their nerd names. He was pretty smashed towards the end. Ziggy Zaggy! Ziggy Zaggy! Oy! Oy! Oy! We had visitors from Biloxi and California. We learned about wallflowers. We had virgin asses. We had a caking. We found out which newly named harrierette has the hots for Just Matilde. We appointed a new Hare Raiser. We gave our FRB (Front Running Bastard) a new trophy. We had one harrierette ball gagged and on her knees. We had a last minute visitor who stuck around and danced in the circle before Cock-a-Booty Boo showed him the pimp hand. We also had 3 awesome namings! 2 at circle and 1 at on after.
Back to circle. Did anyone see Lick A Lotta Cock last night? That bitch wouldn’t shut up during circle, so it was my pleasure to shove one of my balls in her mouth. She told me later that she kind of liked it, but needs me to build up and prepare her for it next time. Also, last night I learned I do love gagging a harrierette while she’s on her knees.
Let’s talk about the birthday slut, 8 Lays a week. She quickly happily dropped down to her knees while 30 people surrounded her, eager to make her look like the star of bukkake video. For anyone who has forgotten, what doesn’t go in you, goes on you! With that I wish her one more very Happy birthday and Fuck you!
We had a special Lucky Charm check. A few hashers stood in line and thought they were going to get lucky. Unfortunately, the only harrierette that would pair up in our little flour colored clover was Batteries Not Included. In almost two years I haven’t seen hashers run so fast
I take that back. I have seen hashers run that face. It happened every time T.W.O.T would scream YBF or on left from the back of the pack for no apparent reason. How do you make a clusterfuck more confusing? Add a tiny little french-asian.
A little reward happened for some short cutting bastards last night. We zigged left at a YBF, and we saw No Cunt-Troll drinkin’ it up for St. Patrick’s day. She screamed, “BEER NEAR” so all the hashers turned around. She emerged from her humble abode with some coconut flavored mixed drink and poured several shots into hashers mouths from her balcony.
On after was held at 8 Lay’s crib. Whoever went to Tracey’s was misinformed since you all missed the third best thing of T.W.O.T.s you could put in your mouth…her cabbages. (the other two things taste asian) She’s like Irish lo mein.
On-On from your bottom loving duo,
Everything Butt Sex & T.W.O.T.