VooDoo #99.5 – Hash Trash

Okay, well, I’ve been away for quite awhile but now I’m BACK to make you suffer through my long diatribes about the minute details of every single VooDoo Hash (FML)! Yay. In fact, I was even so refreshed from my hashing hiatus that I was able to earn the rank of FRB tonight! Well, that and there were plenty of new boots eager to bite the falses (losers). Erectiaphobic also drank with me as FBI and Tempur Penis blamed some dog on his DFL status.  No excuses, Tempur.  I know “bestiality’s best” and all, but come on.

The trail was through the area of good ol’ Jefferson Parish by the river, criss-crossing train tracks and passing under highways and byways and dipping through ditches and some shiggerific overgrowth. I don’t know about you, but I was ankle-deep in mud in a few places. Well done to our THREE HARES. Seriously, who needs three hares to lay a trail? And with three hares, surely you don’t need a 10-minute head start. They laid enough YBFs and false trails to make even a cheetah exhausted. I’m serious. A fucking cheetah.

We had FOUR NEW VIRGINS today. We only would’ve needed one more to make a gangbang. But I guess foursomes are cool, too. So we introduced ourselves to them, and they to us, and we asked them who made them cum to the hash. One of them even said no one made him cum – he wanted to come! We encourage this kind of enthusiasm here at the VooDoo HHH. Our ultimate goal is to foster an environment in which orgies can grow and thrive. It’s like a, grassroots community thing. Good for the kids.

thrillerWe had a slew of accusations tonight! I think there were about ten people in the circle, and that was even before Wee-Blow called in the hares for screwing up chalk talk. Sinners walk among us.

To wrap things up, we had some awards – a few VooDoo candles* and a couple of necklaces**.  Then we had some announcements – upcoming hares are booked through October, Erectiaphobic and I were voluntold to be the hares on Oct. 22nd, Fill Me Up is having a birthday bash, and the Deutsches Haus is holding Oktoberfest for the next 4 weekends. Plus, THE 100TH VOODOO HASH IS GOING DOWN NEXT WEEK! Be there, and don’t forget the social next Friday, too!  All that and more will be dutifully posted on the calendar.

Oh, and they made me dance like a zombified Michael Jackson for the umpteenth time. Assholes.

Lack-a-Virgin, Hey!

*Mexican candles
**NOT pearl necklaces… unfortunately

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